Not wanting to divorce wife

Question ID: 28002

Two days ago my wife has left with my son for JHB with her mother. We have been having problems for a while now.Three days ago, i found an email pertaining very personal info
from a friend of mine addressed to my wife.I have firstly asked her to stay away from this man because he is nothing to her.
The letter stated:

“Shukran, and please don’t be so down, i am going to find out what is on his mind,and I really wish and hope the two of you end up together.
He did not do anything with this girl at work, so cheer up, and speak to him
like normal again.
You my sister and I wont let you down, you mean too much to me. And I
promise you that I will never do something so stupid to “name”, I love her
too much to catch on stupid things, besides I am not that type of person and I never was, so im sure I wont.”

I acted in a very crazy manner as i could not understand the email & asked her again if she was in contact with this person behind my back.She said yes.Which infuriated me.So we spoke to our elders & they made us both feel positive.
But at the end of the night she said she is leaving.Now she says that they are coming back in a week,but not coming back to me.

What to do as she says to me on the phone that she doesnt want to be with me anymore.

She has been doing many wrong things behind my back & now says to the families that i physically abuse her.

Is there any way that we can remain together?I have not mentioned any type of divorce.

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Asked on November 7, 2008 12:00 am
Private answer

Both of you should firstly state openly, clearly without hiding all facts to each other in order to reconcile. Be transparent. No hidden ajendas. Failing which get the elders from both sides to intervene. Failing which go both of you for marriage councelling.

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Answered on November 7, 2008 12:00 am