Massallah pertaining to repentence

as-salaam,
may allah grant you janaat and the higher stages of janaa for the service you are rendering…
my question,, i am committing an act that i really shamefull…i know its wrong…but everytime i leave the act, i revert to it after week or two…i have realised that its wrong and at the moment all the “mishaps” in my life i have attributed to this act as allah’s way of reminding to correct my ways before he send a real punishment on me…
there are similar questions and the answer has been given…but mufti i find myself in a very strange position because i feel shy to ask allah to fogive me and not only that….i feel fear towards allah…i don’t know why…
is this shaitaan way of playing games with me or not and how do i correct this situation i must repent and reform myself before its too late.