I have a problem with anger and misery.
I feel as if up until a number of years ago I was a happy, motivated person who loved life. I believed life always worked out for the best and had a good relationship with ALLAH. I lost alot in the last 12 years, and went through a really bad period of what ifs,and hopelessness. I really feel as if I lost my relationship with ALLAH and that He didn’t care for me anymore and that I was left to defend myself . I felt that the world was dark and I felt afraid of eveything. I didnt want to leave my house at one stage.
I think I’ve come a long way fsince then, but still feel very tight in my mind, heart, and as if I can feel it on my face.
I dont know how to feel sometimes, and am scared to let my mind be happy and relaxed, as if I need to be alert just incase.
I missed out on many opportunities, but I think that was meant to be.
I know what I used to be and what Icould possibly be, I just am scared to face the beauty of it just incase I lose it all, and just incase I begin to move away from Allah.
Please, however this may appear and however silly it may be, please help, especially if there is something I need to do particularly and if there is someone I should talk to.