Question ID: 29887
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My question is I am in a second marriage , my first wife passed away 15 years ago , I have a daughter from that marriage. My second wife who was divorced prior and I are married almost 3 years. In the beginning I was living with her in my mothers house with my daughter who is 16. My second child is 2. My wife was having problems with my mother, all in my absence. She never once told be about their verbal disputes until she would pack up and go to her parents house . It took couple months to resolve this issue and get her back with conditions ….. I have given her 2 talaqs and she returned to me on condition I leave my mothers house and she is not to be forced to visit my mother. I got a flat moved in with my wife and 2 year old daughter. 2 months went ok until a recent argument and because of my situation with the talaqs I phoned her father to talk to her thinking I was doing the right thing. I left for work that morning only to receive a phone call later by my father in law that he took his daughter home . She left without my permission taking my child her possessions and all things she bought with her mehr…emptying the freezer and fridge…her leaving me has nothing to do with me but rather with the past issues she had with my mother… I love her and care and took good care about her…never once raised my hand on her took care of her needs …. She admits that I did not cause this but she cannot carry on in a family that has my mother in it….. Bottom line is she wants a final talaq even if she is wrong about my mother …. However I don’t want to give her because I want to salvage my marriage because of my 2 year old daughter….. I sacrificed leaving my elderly mother and daughter behind to make her happy and still she has issues….always blaming the past for her decision….I recently went over there 5 days after they left to visit my daughter…. Saw her and got into an altercation….. Eventually taking my wedding ring watch and contract phone ….does the return of these items make the final talaq …without actually saying the words I divorce you. What are my rights to see my 2 year old daughter or do the courts have to decide once I divorce her….I still want her but she says if I don’t divorce her she will get it done herself…. We were happy but because I keep in touch with my mother it upsets her… She even refuse to allow my child to go there … My father in law and his wife got upset when I told them my mother comes first than my wife …. She blamed me for not standing up for her though their altercations happened in my absence….she calls my mum a witch ,b….h,psycho … It hurts but I keep quiet ….she mocks my mother spending most of her time on the Musallah and making zikr …. She curses my mother so much yet I chose not to let her go …. I tried to help but my in laws always say I put my mother before my wife…. Can she terminate this marriage on her not being able to stand my mother…..do I have to pay maintenance to her though she decided to end this … I am prepared to take care of my daughters needs not hers …. because I did not ask her to leave … She left our new place without my permission…and without giving me answers for leaving…

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Asked on November 26, 2013 8:14 pm
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No divorce has thus far taken place. You do not have to pay for her expenses. You can pay for your daughters expenses.She cannot unilaterally divorce. Better go to your local Ulema council to resolve this marriage problem. Speaking ill does not solve any problems.
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Answered on November 26, 2013 8:14 pm