Question ID: 30224
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asslamualiakum I am married for 23 yrs now. Was living on my own but 4 yrs ago brought my in laws to stay with us. My in laws were married for 50yrs. BUT my mother in law was verbally abused and had a very difficult life losing two children in one year. Her children were in their 20. She is unable to maintain a home so we brought them to live with us. For couple months my father in law was fine and then hell broke loose. He shouts at her when we not around. Anyway they have been separated for a year now. She told him to leave she could not take it any more. He lives in ===. He has an elder son and a daughter but son does not want him. He got married in April that marriage lasted for a few days. The woman left him. I dont know if hes divorced her yet. My question. He insists on seeing my mother in law. She refuses. Just the mere thought that his come to === freaks her out. When he comes he tends to stay with his daughter or sister. His daughter has tried telling him to leave mummy alone but he says all he wants to do is make salaam BUT my mother does not want to see or speak to him. How to we resolve this? Because i will answer the door and tell him mummy does not want to see him. He believes we are controlling her. He goes telling everyone my husband and I are the ones that dont want to open the door and want him to see mummy. Do we get ullama involved to sit them both down and talk it out? BUT the problem here is that he does not believe he is the problem. He says he does not have a problem with mum why does she not want to see him. Should we suggest writing to him and telling him how she feels?
Jzk

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Asked on August 28, 2013 12:05 pm
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Get Ulema involved. Speak frankly to him. Resolve the matter. Do not let it hang in the air.
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Answered on August 28, 2013 12:05 pm